Akiva: Mr. Samberg, thanks for coming to your performance review. Andy: No problem. Akiva: So, you're in charge around here. Is that fair to say? Andy: Absolutely. I'm the boss. Akiva: Okay. So, take us through a day in the life of "the boss." Andy: Well, the first thing I do is... Talk to corporate (Like a boss) Approve memos (Like a boss) Lead a workshop (Like a boss) Remember birthdays (Like a boss) Direct work flow (Like a boss) My own bathroom (Like a boss) Micromanage (Like a boss) Promote synergy (Like a boss) Hit on Deborah (Like a boss) Get rejected (Like a boss) Swallow sadness (Like a boss) Send some faxes (Like a boss) Call a sex line (Like a boss) Cry deeply (Like a boss) Demand a refund (Like a boss) Eat a bagel (Like a boss) Harassment lawsuit (Like a boss) No promotion (Like a boss) Fifth of vodka (Like a boss) Shit on Deborah's desk (Like a boss) Buy a gun (Like a boss) In my mouth (Like a boss) Oh, fuck, man. I can't fucking do it. Shit... Pussy out (Like a boss) Puke on Deborah's desk (Like a boss) Jump out the window (Like a boss) Suck a dude's dick (Like a boss) Score some coke (Like a boss) Crash my car (Like a boss) Suck my own dick (Like a boss) Eat some chicken strips (Like a boss) Chop my balls off (Like a boss) Black out in the sewer (Like a boss) Meet a giant fish (Like a boss) Fuck his brains out (Like a boss) Turn into a jet (Like a boss) Bomb the Russians (Like a boss) Crash into the sun (Like a boss) Now I'm dead (Like a boss) Akiva: Uh-huh. So, that's an average day for you then? Andy: No doubt. Akiva: You chop your balls off and die? Andy: Hell yeah. Akiva: And I think at, uh, one point there you said something about sucking your own dick? Andy: Nope. Akiva: Actually, I'm pretty sure you did. Andy: Nah, that ain't me. Akiva: Oh-kay. Well, this has been eye-opening for me. Andy: I'm the boss. Akiva: Yeah. No, I got that. You said it about four-hundred times. Andy: I'm the boss. Akiva: Yeah. Yeah, I got it. Andy: I'm the boss. Akiva: No, I heard you. See you later. (door shuts) (Like a boss)