It's time to take my drunk ass home I drank all the whiskey and my money's all gone Hit on all the girls, sang every song It's time to take my drunk ass home Well i worked all week so I could come here Have a good time and an ice cold beer But one turned to ten, and ten turned to twenty and twenty plus an empty bottle's too damn many It's time to take my drunk ass home I drank all the whiskey and my money's all gone Hit on all the girls, sang every song It's time to take my drunk ass home Well, it seems that I misplaced my shirt I cant find my keys for all this parkin' lot dirt My fall-back plan has done got sad Cause my ex-girlfriend ain't lookin' half bad Yeah, it's time to take my drunk ass home I drank all the whiskey and my money's all gone Hit on all the girls, sang every song It's time to take my drunk ass home "Help me up! Aw, put me back down, put me back down." I sucker-punched my best friend And the bouncer head-locked me on stage with the band I look like hell; I feel like shit I think it's time I call it quits Yeah, it's time to take my drunk ass home I drank all the whiskey and my money's all gone Hit on all the girls, sang every song It's time to take my drunk ass home Yeah, it's time to take my drunk ass home I twisted up my ankle, cant find my cell phone Yeah, my lip's all bust and my buzz is gone It's time to take my drunk ass home If y'all agree, then sing along... Yeah, it's time to take my drunk ass home "Aw, somebody call me a cab... please?"